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in the event of my death
Mar. 28th, 2007 03:44 amSo, I'm working on another funeral program for a customer, and it got me thinking about what I would and would not like on my own funeral program, should the event arise.
First, I wouldn't want one, because that means I'm dead. That seems really boring on my end.
However, if I do die, I don't want the words 'sunrise' and 'sunset' used for the dates of my birth and death. Seems a bit silly. I don't want the words 'going home ceremony' to appear anywhere on the funeral program. I'm not going home, I'm being buried. At no point have I lived six feet underground in a 6 ft x 2 ft box.
I do want it to be an open casket funeral unless the means of my death would make that exceptionally disgusting (torn apart by giant robot, severe dismemberment by hordes of screaming fan-girls... exceptional old age). I fully expect that at least one of my brothers (if they are still alive at the time) will want to verify that I am actually dead, so a hammer and stake will be made available.
I don't want the funeral program to have any baby pictures in it. Frankly, most of my baby pictures have my brothers in them as well, and that's a touch confusing. Nor should there be any pictures of me smiling. Any pictures should be true to life and I should have a look on my face like I'm being forced to deal with simpletons.
The music played at the funeral should be songs that I actually like, and not the depressing standard funeral music. Hook up a stereo system and have System of a Down piped in. Failing that, the Undertaker's music from WWE. Actually, the latter should be the music played during the march where the pallbearer's carry my casket out.
First, I wouldn't want one, because that means I'm dead. That seems really boring on my end.
However, if I do die, I don't want the words 'sunrise' and 'sunset' used for the dates of my birth and death. Seems a bit silly. I don't want the words 'going home ceremony' to appear anywhere on the funeral program. I'm not going home, I'm being buried. At no point have I lived six feet underground in a 6 ft x 2 ft box.
I do want it to be an open casket funeral unless the means of my death would make that exceptionally disgusting (torn apart by giant robot, severe dismemberment by hordes of screaming fan-girls... exceptional old age). I fully expect that at least one of my brothers (if they are still alive at the time) will want to verify that I am actually dead, so a hammer and stake will be made available.
I don't want the funeral program to have any baby pictures in it. Frankly, most of my baby pictures have my brothers in them as well, and that's a touch confusing. Nor should there be any pictures of me smiling. Any pictures should be true to life and I should have a look on my face like I'm being forced to deal with simpletons.
The music played at the funeral should be songs that I actually like, and not the depressing standard funeral music. Hook up a stereo system and have System of a Down piped in. Failing that, the Undertaker's music from WWE. Actually, the latter should be the music played during the march where the pallbearer's carry my casket out.