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Well, this isn't good news for me
Heavy Drinkers Outlive Nondrinkers, Study Finds
Basically, even after discounting those non-drinkers who were formerly heavy drinkers, the highest mortality rates (over the 20 year period covered) were for non-drinkers, then heavy drinkers, and the lowest mortality rate was for non-drinkers.
.....
Well, then... Seems I need me a beer. (Actually, I find most beer to taste terrible, but I've been thinking about picking up a bottle of Scotch whisky.)
Basically, even after discounting those non-drinkers who were formerly heavy drinkers, the highest mortality rates (over the 20 year period covered) were for non-drinkers, then heavy drinkers, and the lowest mortality rate was for non-drinkers.
.....
Well, then... Seems I need me a beer. (Actually, I find most beer to taste terrible, but I've been thinking about picking up a bottle of Scotch whisky.)

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You like sweet beverages right? (Dr. Pepper is it?) Maybe you'd enjoy those mike's hard drinks.
Oh and Dr. Pepper + Vodka is called a "Dr. Kevorkian." Just so you know.
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(Yes, I see from context that you got that. It's just not in your post)
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