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Some random thoughts on Judgement Day
No, not the Christian Apocalypse, although in comparison to a few of the matches, unleashing the Anti-Christ would have been preferable...
Six Man Tag Match: Cena & the F.B.I vs. Rhyno, Benoit, and Spanky
How the "mighty" have fallen. From main-eventing to curtain jerker... now if Cena would only stop with the damn Vanilla Ice impression.... Got to wonder what Benoit did to not only be stuck in this crap match, but to lose. And Spanky did not look good at the end of this match.
WTG, Chuck... this is at least a step up from being part of Billy and Chuck. Well, maybe a step sideways...
La Resistance vs. Scott Steiner & Test
It's sad that I can not only call the match in advance, but was able to call "Steiner is in position. Cue the Keibler bump." Otherwise.... ehhhh... Dear WWE writers: If you're going to break up the team of Steiner and Test, go ahead and do it already. Sheesh.
Oh yeah... La Resistance won. Like anyone cares.
WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match
Team Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero & Tajiri
Far and away the best match of the night. But I expect no less from Eddie and Tajiri. Team Angle, as well, continues to impress me, and even though they are no longer the Tag Champs, I don't see this feud ending or them being buried any time soon.
Some good chemistry and moves from Eddie and Tajiri. The ladder crotching of Charlie Haas was great, good selling of moves all around, and the green mist to Shelton Benjamin, enabling Eddie to grab the belts, was priceless.
Intercontinental Battle Royal
This match got down to 4 men way too quickly. I wasn't surprised that Lance Storm was the first to get ejected, but Kane being second surprised me. In short order, Test, Val Venis, and Rob Van Dam were eliminated, leaving Goldust, Booker T, Jericho and Christian in the match. Goldust lasted a few minutes longer, but was thrown out by Booker T. (No hard feelings though)
Jericho won best facial expression of the night though, when he was eliminated by Christian, with the semi-bug-eyed "I can't believe you turned on me like that look."
The only bad part was the complete screwjob to Booker T (yet again), that has Christian as the official winner of the IC title, even though Booker T eliminated him while the ref was "unconscious". Hey, WWE, get some refs who can take more then a love tap before dropping like a rock. They're either going to reverse this on RAW, or set it up for a match for the next PPV.
Bikini Contest
You know, if I found either of these women even remotely attractive, I'd have watched this. As is, I checked my e-mail.
Mr. America (w/Tenacious Z) vs. Roddy Piper (w/Sean O'Haire)
Look, it's every single Hogan vs. Piper match that you've ever seen before, only both participants are in even worse shape then they've ever been. And ye gods, but standing next to O'Haire, Piper looks like he was made out of play-doh. Pasty white play-doh.
Mercifully, a short match. Mr. America, aka Hogan (dude, you aren't even fooling Ray Charles, and he's blind) won. Again, like anyone cares.
World Heavyweight Championship Match
Triple H w/ Ric Flair vs. Kevin Nash w/ Shawn Michaels
Well, at least Ric and Shawn ended up not ruining the match by interfering. But that's okay, as the match was ruined by the complete lack of moves, finesse, pacing, style, and content. Folks, I'd say this match sucked, but that's an insult to every sucky match ever. Two wrestlers who are, in theory, in the business this long, and, in theory, at the top of their game, should not suck this bad in the ring. I mean, shit, Hogan's had better matches then this. Not recently, mind you....
No resolution either, as a DQ ended the match, but not the suffering of the viewing audience. Oh, and apparently, HHH managed to dislocate the ref's shoulder with the DQ move. WTG, asshat. (Can you tell I don't like HHH?)
Fatal Four-Way WWE Women’s Championship Match
Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Jaqueline vs. Victoria
Dear HHH, we the bookers of the WWE thought so little of the potential of your match with Kevin Nash that we decided to not make it part of a "double main event" where the big matches are the last ones on the card. In fact, we thought so little of your match that we're putting the women's title match on after it. And guess what, it will be a better match.
And it was. Decent pacing. Decent moves. Sure, some were a bit telegraphed, but nothing compared to the lumbering pile of crap that was HHH vs. Nash.
Personally, I would have made it an elimination match, just to actually give the chance for the match to mean something (and given my previous comments on the women's matches, that is admitting a lot). As it is, far too much of this match's potential is wasted because the participants really can't get a lot of moves off in a row without interference.
Better then I thought it would be though.
WWE Championship Stretcher Match
Brock Lesnar vs. The Big Show
I had predicted to my room-mate,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
taser that out of the two big title matches, one of them would suck so bad that it would make the other one look like a gem of wrestling in comparison. Now, having gone over already what a festering leprous mass of sewage the HHH vs. Nash match was....
Yes, Lesnar vs. Show was interesting to watch. Not great. Hell, taken by itself, it would be mediocre. But after the aforementioned shit-fest, it was good. I especially liked the historical commentary on the last stretcher match.
And, quite frankly, I wasn't expecting a lot, which made this match better. I mean, I don't expect the Big Show to be doing a great repetoire of moves. The same for Lesnar (thank god, no attempt on a Shooting Star Press). The pacing was good. The Big Show being yanked off the stretcher because of the cables wrapped around him was a nice move, and I must say, the forklift ending was amusing.
Oh, and of course, having Rey Mysterio appear and help out is always a bonus.
It could have been a better PPV, but it also could have been a lot worse. Having the third match rock so much probably didn't help the rest of the card, as it's hard to work up to the match that Eddie, Tajiri, and Team Angle put on.
Six Man Tag Match: Cena & the F.B.I vs. Rhyno, Benoit, and Spanky
How the "mighty" have fallen. From main-eventing to curtain jerker... now if Cena would only stop with the damn Vanilla Ice impression.... Got to wonder what Benoit did to not only be stuck in this crap match, but to lose. And Spanky did not look good at the end of this match.
WTG, Chuck... this is at least a step up from being part of Billy and Chuck. Well, maybe a step sideways...
La Resistance vs. Scott Steiner & Test
It's sad that I can not only call the match in advance, but was able to call "Steiner is in position. Cue the Keibler bump." Otherwise.... ehhhh... Dear WWE writers: If you're going to break up the team of Steiner and Test, go ahead and do it already. Sheesh.
Oh yeah... La Resistance won. Like anyone cares.
WWE Tag Team Championship Ladder Match
Team Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero & Tajiri
Far and away the best match of the night. But I expect no less from Eddie and Tajiri. Team Angle, as well, continues to impress me, and even though they are no longer the Tag Champs, I don't see this feud ending or them being buried any time soon.
Some good chemistry and moves from Eddie and Tajiri. The ladder crotching of Charlie Haas was great, good selling of moves all around, and the green mist to Shelton Benjamin, enabling Eddie to grab the belts, was priceless.
Intercontinental Battle Royal
This match got down to 4 men way too quickly. I wasn't surprised that Lance Storm was the first to get ejected, but Kane being second surprised me. In short order, Test, Val Venis, and Rob Van Dam were eliminated, leaving Goldust, Booker T, Jericho and Christian in the match. Goldust lasted a few minutes longer, but was thrown out by Booker T. (No hard feelings though)
Jericho won best facial expression of the night though, when he was eliminated by Christian, with the semi-bug-eyed "I can't believe you turned on me like that look."
The only bad part was the complete screwjob to Booker T (yet again), that has Christian as the official winner of the IC title, even though Booker T eliminated him while the ref was "unconscious". Hey, WWE, get some refs who can take more then a love tap before dropping like a rock. They're either going to reverse this on RAW, or set it up for a match for the next PPV.
Bikini Contest
You know, if I found either of these women even remotely attractive, I'd have watched this. As is, I checked my e-mail.
Mr. America (w/Tenacious Z) vs. Roddy Piper (w/Sean O'Haire)
Look, it's every single Hogan vs. Piper match that you've ever seen before, only both participants are in even worse shape then they've ever been. And ye gods, but standing next to O'Haire, Piper looks like he was made out of play-doh. Pasty white play-doh.
Mercifully, a short match. Mr. America, aka Hogan (dude, you aren't even fooling Ray Charles, and he's blind) won. Again, like anyone cares.
World Heavyweight Championship Match
Triple H w/ Ric Flair vs. Kevin Nash w/ Shawn Michaels
Well, at least Ric and Shawn ended up not ruining the match by interfering. But that's okay, as the match was ruined by the complete lack of moves, finesse, pacing, style, and content. Folks, I'd say this match sucked, but that's an insult to every sucky match ever. Two wrestlers who are, in theory, in the business this long, and, in theory, at the top of their game, should not suck this bad in the ring. I mean, shit, Hogan's had better matches then this. Not recently, mind you....
No resolution either, as a DQ ended the match, but not the suffering of the viewing audience. Oh, and apparently, HHH managed to dislocate the ref's shoulder with the DQ move. WTG, asshat. (Can you tell I don't like HHH?)
Fatal Four-Way WWE Women’s Championship Match
Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Jaqueline vs. Victoria
Dear HHH, we the bookers of the WWE thought so little of the potential of your match with Kevin Nash that we decided to not make it part of a "double main event" where the big matches are the last ones on the card. In fact, we thought so little of your match that we're putting the women's title match on after it. And guess what, it will be a better match.
And it was. Decent pacing. Decent moves. Sure, some were a bit telegraphed, but nothing compared to the lumbering pile of crap that was HHH vs. Nash.
Personally, I would have made it an elimination match, just to actually give the chance for the match to mean something (and given my previous comments on the women's matches, that is admitting a lot). As it is, far too much of this match's potential is wasted because the participants really can't get a lot of moves off in a row without interference.
Better then I thought it would be though.
WWE Championship Stretcher Match
Brock Lesnar vs. The Big Show
I had predicted to my room-mate,
taser that out of the two big title matches, one of them would suck so bad that it would make the other one look like a gem of wrestling in comparison. Now, having gone over already what a festering leprous mass of sewage the HHH vs. Nash match was....Yes, Lesnar vs. Show was interesting to watch. Not great. Hell, taken by itself, it would be mediocre. But after the aforementioned shit-fest, it was good. I especially liked the historical commentary on the last stretcher match.
And, quite frankly, I wasn't expecting a lot, which made this match better. I mean, I don't expect the Big Show to be doing a great repetoire of moves. The same for Lesnar (thank god, no attempt on a Shooting Star Press). The pacing was good. The Big Show being yanked off the stretcher because of the cables wrapped around him was a nice move, and I must say, the forklift ending was amusing.
Oh, and of course, having Rey Mysterio appear and help out is always a bonus.
It could have been a better PPV, but it also could have been a lot worse. Having the third match rock so much probably didn't help the rest of the card, as it's hard to work up to the match that Eddie, Tajiri, and Team Angle put on.