It would either be awesome or signal the downfall of civilization...

if you could have Krispy Kreme delivered like pizza is.

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And Wal-Mart's heart grew two sizes that day.

No, not really. They just responded to all the bad press.

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And there was a great wailing and a gnashing of teeth, and an eruption of bladders, and a voice from the Pit said "Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha, fuckers. Just when you thought things couldn't get any worse."