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I couldn't do his job
Okay, the President is an idiot. I'm not going to argue that point. I don't think anyone on my friends' list would either. And even though I consider myself fairly smart, I don't think I do could do Bush's job.
This has nothing to do with what I perceive as my ability to run a country, prosecute a war, or buddy up to the oil industry. It's because I wouldn't take the job very seriously.
I mean, calling up the Premier of China and ordering take-out? Yeah, I can't see that going over very well, except on the comedy circuit. And if I wasn't harrassing Wen Jiabao over that mu shu pork that hasn't arrived yet, I'd be laying into him verbally over the failure of communism. "Listen Wen, we've got this city here in the States, called Berkeley. They've been communist for just as long as you, and they've really been trying it. And you know, those Californians... smart as a whip. Crazy as a shithouse rat, half the time, but smart. And if they can't get it to work... well, I'm just saying..."
This has nothing to do with what I perceive as my ability to run a country, prosecute a war, or buddy up to the oil industry. It's because I wouldn't take the job very seriously.
I mean, calling up the Premier of China and ordering take-out? Yeah, I can't see that going over very well, except on the comedy circuit. And if I wasn't harrassing Wen Jiabao over that mu shu pork that hasn't arrived yet, I'd be laying into him verbally over the failure of communism. "Listen Wen, we've got this city here in the States, called Berkeley. They've been communist for just as long as you, and they've really been trying it. And you know, those Californians... smart as a whip. Crazy as a shithouse rat, half the time, but smart. And if they can't get it to work... well, I'm just saying..."
Re: well...
Sweden would get daily requests for the bikini team to come give me backrubs.
Germany... Germany would immediately become the best ally of the U.S., but only during October, when the entire Congress would be required to dress in lederhosen and drink copious amounts of German beer (not the weak-ass yellow piss-water we have here)
Japan would get a weekly notice about radioactive monsters rising off their coast. Might even get mentioned in the State of the Union address.
On a more serious note, China would get told to back the fuck off of Taiwan and get the fuck out of Tibet.
Re: well...
First time France or Canada refused to send us a murderer because we have the death penalty, and will ONLY send them back if we promise to NOT seek the death sentence, would be "I'm sending two planes... One has Federal Marshals... Either you put that person on the first one so we can try them in court and let the Proscecuters decide on Capital Punishment, or I use the Millitary in the second plane - oh, did I mention that the second plane would be every SEAL we have, cause it will - and we take the guy by force, and then egg your house to boot..."